Florence

Remember when no one could touch us?
You were Superman
I was Wonder Woman
and cape, candles, and
a length of rope
were all we needed

Love at first sight?
I grabbed at you
like in a haunted house
frantic and wasteful
horrific in its lies
but she will not have you
my right to be here
is grandfather’d in

I remember when we arrived here
such hopes consumed me–
I tried to love you, my idea of you
my vision of us, your selfish words, and
my selfish plans coated with expectation
left us in the dust

And now I think I will die here
and never see Paris
or the Thames
never throw my wishes into the fountain
I will die here
and never see Rome
or eat figs from a tree in Sicily
and Florence is just a lady on t.v.

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You, bewilder me (nt)

what you say
what you always say
never satisfied
hurting with you
sharing
what is mine is yours

and yours
is also mine
even the ugly
but let’s put
a bandaid on that
and some word salve

you are never satisfied
never satisfied
never satisfied
no contentment
in what your hands hold
always, you are looking, for
what is elusive

so I hunt for you
caring too much, she tells me
trying too hard to be the one, the hero
that carries home the ten point buck
only to be in your sights again
your one–your redemptor

is is possible
so she asks
for someone
with all my inherited good sense
to give up decades
for one glorious pedestal moment
when you see me golden

mooring

your pleas for trust are heavy
the scales made of sugar
threaten to melt to nothing
if I cry

why does the sky
part easily for the gulls
no matter my mood
or the weather

together is our only hope
our lies of decades past
must not be allowed entrance
into this asylum

She showed him what she bought

She showed him what she bought
at the resale shop
not the dingy Salvation Army
with its over-priced cast-offs
but the lovely one with the antique signs
and potpourri
air-conditioning
and a nice lady that said
let me know if I can show you anything

And he pictured her in the green satin top
how her breasts would feel through
the shiny, supple fabric
and how long it had been
since he felt any part of her
except her hand, whenever
she allowed him to help her
from out of the car

Couples therapy

You are infuriating, he said
(I try, I said)
You drive me wild
(I am wild)
You forget to call
(my heart was calling
I hoped, you had
heard it)

Let’s get away, you said
(I am afraid to fly)
Let’s remember what we
wanted when we started
(I adore you)
I need a break, you say
(you broke me)

You are loud in public
(I wanted you to see me)
You keep to yourself
(it is safer that way)

I adore you
(I feel adored)
I want you
(I wanted you first)

If anyone asks

it wasn’t luck
that brought us together
or fate
and it might have been God
doing that
but so far I have received
no official word

all I know for certain
all I remember
are fireworks going off
food tasting better
and all the senses
heightened

and if you go
there will be no more
explosions
my meals plain
and without
any spice

Fog samba

 

fog-w-people

Take me on
with the jingle jangle of my ankles
wearing my bangles as we dance
through the gray Jell-O nights
sucking down
lazy Sunday lattés
in a Laffy Taffy hammock
Every worn dream
being replaced, by
shiny new ocean-view vistas
and you
keeping me closer
than
paint on walls

Look at me

because you don’t see me
anymore

now with my bonnet off
I’ll dance in the rain
or play on the train tracks

foolhardy soul
what losses now

because you don’t see me

the fear is waning
and all bets are off
when it comes down

to
assumptions
conclusions
predictions

and my brave face

because you no longer
see me

each rose
smells that much sweeter
being discovered
and
I take the steps
two at a time
a miracle on this day

as I am still here

when you look through me

I don’t get sad when the fog rolls in
the blanket enveloping me
reminding me of what is real

not your fantasy
with pinpricks and Tabasco sauce
and each day
less and less
I remember what we said

You stopped taking me into account

and I took another look
at my books, but
doing your own accounting
is foolhardy

and takes a cast iron heart

Now that you can’t see me

what was bright like neon
is dull under your spell

your moods like
the ocean

my invisible coat
you bid me wear

big moon
jagged stars
playing riffs in the blackest night

serenading–do you know
what felt like a golden moment
someone wants from me

for a lifetime

your heart

moving
pulsing
still tomorrow
your words something I have grown
too clingy to
hush
don’t criticize

I will be finished soon

Invisible now
the day scares me–
I want to run from it

hush

the night is nearly come
and today relegated to
the history of days

Frank talk

Will you make me stop talking about you when the sleep finally comes? Will you waste all of our seasons for the sake of a bitter flavour in the soup? Not all is bitter, and you know it, if only you are to take another taste. The bitter with the sweet and savoury, always there, not this one-dimensional Frankenstein monster you imagine it to be. My hope, always there, is that when the comfort comes, you will return to the relationship, start again with listening and (for)giving, and taking also, because we are still alive, and we are walking around as if we are dead.

Not all is bitter, and you know it, if only you are to take another taste. The bitter with the sweet and savoury, always there, not this one-dimensional Frankenstein monster you imagine to be.

will you make me stop thinking about you when
sleep finally comes?
waiting all of our seasons
for the sake of bitter herbs in the soup.

the bitter
with the sweet
always there
we are not
this one-dimensional
two-headed
Frankenstein monster
you imagine us
to be