Monday random: silence

  • I am going to say this right out, right now: I am uncomfortable with complete silence
  • The reasons for this are varied, but most come from childhood and are fairly evident by poetry regarding the same. Rephrased: enough said about that.
  • This week I was under the weather, mostly I think from allowing myself to become rundown
  • Plus after a particularly rough patch, I followed it with a great deal of sugary snacks, which we all have come to know are poison.
  • I did not go to the doctor, but I did doctor myself with water, vegetables, fruit, vitamins, sunshine, and colloidal silver
  • and sleep, which I am still working on.
  • I just can’t get enough, but I am trying

Continue reading “Monday random: silence”

crying twice
since coffee
over questions and fears
your voice comes through
the fog of yesterday
the dog barking
the mask peeling
and your generous love
touches my heart
each time I drop to my knees
even so, Lord
even so
You drop over me
a veil that brings
more tears
with only joy

Lemon pie blues

Today hurt bad like cuts on my fingers
then slicing lemons for hours
your face, always disappointed, and
I would like to be the girl
to bring light to your eyes

How do I explain why it hurts more
to be misunderstood than kicked
honey, how I wish I could have you here
to protect me now
because I am feeling low

Feeling tired and wondering why
I never fit into this world of woe
come Sunday, everything
is going to feel alright
praise God on Sunday we will dance

and give happiness one more chance
come Sunday
everything is gonna feel alright

I wandered through the afternoon
sifting through debris
kicking at stones
into evening, when I sulked
and moped my way toward bedtime
and prayer, entering my mind
the idea, the thought
that I could talk to you Lord
that you would listen, and hear
faded all of that to barely a whisper
that I flicked aside

Dog days psalm

trees and sky

The loneliness has been beating me up
following me around during these dog days
a bag of rocks hanging around my neck
that I could not be wholly rid of

But when I fall on my knees
I feel so free, taking my eyes off me
I fall on my knees and I’m feeling released
when I pray and thank you Lord for your love

The stifling heat tries to tell me lies
that the bad will follow me around for good
voices in my head that say there’s no point
to convince me to stop trying and just lay down

But when I fall to my knees
feeling love, in sweet repose
the peace comes like fog rolling in
and the loneliness–it hits the streets

inspired by Isaiah 26:3 (ESV)
You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.


It is dark here
the blinds pulled down
the last record spinning and scratching
and no one notices it
or takes it off

Our hopes
wrapped in these days
that offer nothing in the middle
only more darkness
or a way out

On my knees
I could pray and feel You there
but I know You hear me, walking
down this cracked sidewalk
for the last time

I watch us from atop this wall
it took me years to scale

Did wishing bring my toes
to the edge of the precipice?

Will reverent prayer make it small
beneath my feet?

Hymn or hum


If I had enough hope to fit in a thimble
this mountain would move.
And if I could sing like an angel
maybe the angels themselves
would perch on my shoulder to listen.
Instead, my hope is merely a droplet
and my voice-the squeak of a screen door-
and I reach for the notes that will
reverberate into the heavens.
For what are we if we do not at least
attempt to touch the finger of God
and aspire to touch others with
a song bird’s song–
Who am I to think
that my plaintive cry would reach God’s ears
were it not for His promise?
And I am undone when it comes to You-
my hope drip-dripping into the thimble
with another new day beginning.

Being cool in hot places

(a psalm for summer)

I call upon you Lord
in my weakness
when patience
is difficult to find
and days last so long

My dear sweet friend
no one else
has shown me
what real faithfulness is
and I am grateful

But even in my peace
I receive
from Your spirit
sometimes I get
restless and tired

I count on You
to show me
the way to contentment
in my times of troubles
ever grateful for Your gifts